Hawaii court of appeals holds that elephants (yes, actual elephants) are not “persons” as that term is used in state’s habeas corpus statute.
An animal rights group wanted to spring two elephants from the Honolulu Zoo. Went about as well as you’d expect. This seems to be a thing (check out this Colorado case deploying the same tactic, with the same success rate — guess all it takes is one.)
Several thoughts:
The opinion is 6 pages. Which is 5.95 pages longer than we would have needed to affirm.
The unpublished opinion garnered a two-judge concurring opinion. Yeah, elephants *really* are not persons, dude.
The average time for an appeal to resolve in the Hawaii court of appeals is down (yes, *down*) to 2-3 years (we recently had a routine civil appeal that lingered on the court’s docket for nearly 6 years). Litigants and lawyers who bring are-elephants-persons type of appeals are one of the reasons that legitimate litigants seeking appellate relief in that court are being denied timely justice.
Was it a close call?